• Larkyn Simony

Local Area Woman Steals Last Bag of Cheetos, is “So Extra”

Simony’s Family and Friends Report Fearing an Outburst of This Magnitude for a Long Time


November 22, 2020

Atlanta, Georgia


Tensions were high yesterday at the Peachtree Road location of Subway in North Atlanta. Diner Larkyn Simony, 42, an Atlanta native, was waiting to pay for her sandwich when onlookers say she began "scouring the chip rack."


Johnson McDougal, 24, of Sandy Springs, reports that "She (Simony) was staring at that rack like she was undressing it with her eyes. I don't know what she was looking for, but I sure wish a lady would look at me like that."


Melanie Ringle, 19, of Tallahassee, Florida, witnessed the events that happened next. Ringle reports that Simony reached for a bag of Cheetos while another patron reached for the bag. Simony appeared to notice the other diner reaching for what was the restaurant's last remaining bag of Cheetos, and what happened next can only be described as shocking.


Ringle says, "She (Simony) shoved the other person out of the way, and he was only, like, seven or eight years old! He fell down and started crying, and she looked like a deer in headlights. Then she held the bag of Cheetos to her chest and ran out of the store."


Simony reached the Buckhead Target on Peachtree Road before being apprehended by Atlanta police. She will reportedly be charged with assault, theft, and running while eating junk food. Simony ate the entire bag of Cheetos during her sprint and then threw up on an officer's shoe during her arrest.


While the public is outraged, Simony's family and friends report fearing an outburst of this magnitude for a long time.


Erin Harrell, 35, of Dunwoody, Simony's friend and former coworker, stated in a phone interview, "I can't say this surprises me. Larkyn has always been so extra, and stealing a bag of Cheetos fits right in with her usual shenanigans. That girl is off the chain. Come to think of it, I don't usually use old-ass slang like that, but Larkyn says it all the time, and now I can't get it out of my head."


The name of the patron Simony assaulted is not being released due to his status as a minor. Simony will be arraigned next week and is currently confined to her home wearing an ankle monitor to prevent any further "extra" behavior.

Image by Jeff Mendoza on Unsplash

Recent Posts

See All

© 2020 Simony Says Publishing & Media